A Drunk Elfprince
by MadDoggyClown
Summary: Red and Abe finally get Nuada to drink with them, it turns out that the Prince enjoys the taste of beer very much, and gets drunk pretty easily. So what'll happen in the BPRD-building, with a drunken elf prince around?


**This was an idea I came up with when I saw the "Can't Smile Without You" scene of Red and Abe getting drunk, since Abe is not the type to get drunk I thought why not let Prince Nuada get drunk as well, that's something even more funny xD**

**Warning: If you can't take a little humor or humiliation of your characters you shouldn't read this, 'cause I'll be humiliating Nuada big time x'D**

**If I had to make a list of things Nuada would never do, the things he's going to do in THIS story would be in top 5, look forward to read a funny little story about a night at the BPRD with our beloved elf prince x3**

**Enjoy, R&R please!**

- - - - -

The Golden Army had been destroyed long ago, the elf Prince had realized his defeat and rebuild his kingdom together with his sister. They were living peacefully in Bethmora, long away from humans.

Well except for right now, Prince Nuada and Princess Nuala had decided to go on a vacation to visit old buddies in the human-world. It's been a few days since they arrived at the BPRD, this was all Nuala's idea though, and Nuada wasn't very happy about it at first, but he had to go to please his beloved sister.

"Hey Nuada" Red waved at the elf prince as he entered the library. He was sitting in a large chair smoking one of his big cigars as always. Next to him stood Abe Sapien holding a couple of books in his hands, those very thick ones he used to read 4 of each day.

Nuada wasn't in a very great mood, but whenever was he anyways? He didn't answer the big red devil, and it seemed to annoy him right away.

"I said 'hi' Blonde" he sighed, blowing out a big amount of smoke.

"Hello" Nuada simply answered settling himself in a chair away from the two others, he looked suspicious at them "what did you want to talk about that was so important?" he asked, sounding serious.

Hellboy chuckled at Nuada's serious tone, then he held a beer in his hand and threw it over to the Prince "catch" he just said.

Nuada caught the small can in his hand, with his damn fast reflexes. He looked puzzled at the can and then looked at his red friend again.

"What is this?" he asked.

"An ancient drink on Earth, brewed on water, hops and rice mostly, the publication is not known for sure" Abe quickly said, as he himself stood with one of those cans in his hand.

"Beer in short, try some it's good" Hellboy added and opened his own can with his red tail.

Nuada looked at the silver can once again, then he looked at the guys, he noticed how Abe managed to open his can and he did the same. Once the can was open a new and weird smell filled Nuada's nose. He didn't know for sure if he was supposed to be disgusted or curious.

"How does it taste?" the Prince asked, looking to Red who was already drinking his beer.

"Taste for yourself" he said between sips.

"I don't drink stuff I'm not familiar with" said Nuada and placed the can on the desk.

"Oh that's okay" Hellboy started "if you don't dare you shouldn't do it" he joked.

"What?!" Nuada frowned.

"Hey I understand it, you're just a chicken that's all, you don't have the guts to try something new" Red mocked him.

"Oh yeah? Watch me!" Nuada said and he quickly grabbed the can again.

Nuada sniffed the essence this odd drink bore; he then placed the can-hole up to his lips and took a nip of the liquid. It took some time for him to really react on the taste and while he did so, both Abe and Red held their breath in excitement.

Nuada started coughing and his eyes widened, Red and Abe kept on looking at him and his bizarre reactions, they figured this must be his first time tasting alcohol.

He started shaking his head wildly as if trying drugs for the first time, his mouth opened seeming like he was trying to say something, and then his eyes started watering. The next moment he almost roared and then looked at his friends.

"This is the best I've ever tasted" he said in a rusty voice.

Red gave Abe a slender look and Abe nodded in agreement, "I think you're ready for the next step Prince Boy" Hellboy told him and stood up.

**

Nuada watched as Abe walked over to the stereo system and put on a CD, then he pressed 'play' and in the next moment a song started to play in the room.

"Hey Abe buddy, switch to no. 5" Red ordered.

Abe did as he told and a new song started playing, Nuada recognized the song immediately, though he wasn't very happy about humans he enjoyed some of their work.

"Is that?" Nuada asked Red and he nodded "oh yes it is" he grinned.

"Dancing Queen sung by ABBA" Abe read what was written on the CD cover.

"I love that song!" Nuada said taking another gulp of his beer, Red looked amused at the Prince and settled down on the small stairs in the middle of the library, realizing Nuada already was pretty drunk, what else would be expected of a guy who had never ever tasted alcohol before in his life?

"_See that girl, watch that scene diggin' the dancing queen", _Nuada started singing.

Abe walked over beside Red, looking at the drunken prince. Red pulled out another dozen of beer-cans.

"Hey Nuada I didn't know you could sing" Red chuckled once again; a slight laughter also came from his blue friend next to him.

Nuada kept on singing; he enjoyed the song though it was something he would never tell anybody in sober condition.

In a moment both Hellboy and Abe started singing as the Prince's backup choir.

Without mentioning it the three of them had a great time until song ended and yet a new song started.

**

"Okay okay, how about this one?" Abe said as he now stood on the floor, while Nuada sat next to Hellboy still drinking their brains out.

They looked at Abe Sapien as he did parodies on people, his new position resembled someone with his hand stretched in the air. Abe had wrapped a curtain around his body as if he was wearing a robe.

"Oh! I know that one!" Red said as he pointed at Abe.

"It's Caesar" Nuada said and Abe nodded.

"Hey you're good at this game, I thought you didn't like humans" Red said complimenting.

"Well I had to study humans for a while though" Nuada laughed as he took another sip of his beer.

"Okay, now it's your turn Nuada" Abe said and switched place with the Prince.

**

After a while of singing old fashioned songs and doing lame parodies of famous people, the guys heard a knock on the door. They stopped what they were doing and looked as the door opened up and Nuada's sister; Princess Nuala entered the room.

"Excuse me, may I disturb you for a while?" she asked in a kind voice, and closed the door after herself.

"Nuala my dear sister, please dance with me!" Nuada approached his sister with open arms as the CD played a classic song. He pulled her close and dragged her out on the floor, starting to dance around with his sister.

"Nuada? What's wrong?" Nuala giggled not understanding what was wrong with her brother.

Her brother didn't answer her question he just dragged her along while he moved in funny ways, dance moves that didn't even fit one bit with the song.

Hellboy laughed out at the sight of the drunken prince swinging his sister around "I tell you blonde! You can sing, but hell you can't dance!" Red almost fell backwards while laughing, and the Prince also could drag yet another laugh out of Abe Sapien as well.

That sight was simply way too funny, Nuada jumped and leaped around followed by his sister, who almost had to run after him not to trip. She also found it quite funny; her brother usually was so serious. The last time she had seen her brother like this was back when they were kids, long before the war.

"I just wanted to ask if you would like to join me and Liz in a walk around the town?" she said while she was out of breath and still giggled.

"Sorry Nuala, but your brother has gotten other plans for tonight" Red said with a sly smile.

"That's okay" she smiled back and finally her brother let go of her again so she could regain her breath.

"I'll be going now, I'll see you later" she said as she walked out of the library again.

**

"That was quite a show you put on Nuada" Hellboy 'complimented' him as he lit up another cigar, his fourth by now.

"Thanks" he mumbled, even more drunk by now. He stood by the stereo system reading the numbers on the CD cover. He flipped through the songs stopping at no. 11.

"Another of your favourites Prince?" Abe asked curious.

"Oh yes" he said walking out to the middle of the floor one more time again.

The music started playing:

'_I'm too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love; love's going to leave me'_

And again the elf Prince started dancing, though he danced better solo than with a partner.

Red and Abe still sat on the stairs enjoying Nuada's crazy trip.

The elf Prince started loosen his red belt tossing it at the ground, while he took a sip of his eighth beer. Everything was dancing in his mind, he felt funny inside and had a good time to take pleasure in his new experience.

He kept on dancing as the song continued. He only wore his pants in the middle of the song.

Neither Abe could hold in his laughing more, Red had put an arm over his buddy and together they were trying to sing along, though they didn't do a very good job they kept on.

By accident Red lost his balance just by sitting, and happened to push the 'alert' button on the desk next to him. The alarm started sounding all over the BPRD building while a red light flashed in the entire building.

"Whoops" Hellboy mumbled as he saw the light, but it didn't seem that Nuada took notice of it at all.

Abe looked at Red "what did you do?" he asked.

"I think I switched on the alarm" he answered looking towards the door.

When finally Nuada pulled off his pants, and only stood with a small cloth wrapped around his more noble parts, the BPRD guards kicked open the door to the library standing in the door-opening with loaded guns. When they saw the butt-naked Prince in front of them, they slowly lowered their weapons keeping their eyes fixated on him. Some looked puzzled, others disgusted and even others sceptical.

Nuada turned towards them, giving them a bewildered look; no doubt he hadn't heard the alarm at all, he had been too busy with his erotic dancing to take notice.

Nuala and Liz came into the room as well but they stopped instantly when they saw the Prince in his underwear. Nuala almost blushed by the sight of her naked brother, true they were siblings but they hadn't seen each other nude. And Liz couldn't hold back a big laugh.

Then Red and Abe started laughing too, and soon the whole squad of guards joined them in their laughing, they had already put their guns away.

Nuala too couldn't hold resist giggling a bit as well; true it was kinda funny to see this side of her own brother.

Nuada had no idea what was going on around him and without thinking he joined them in their laughing competition.

Almost everyone had tears in their eyes from laughing so hard at something that seemed _so _unreal in their minds they couldn't keep from doing so.

Though Nuada still was laughing loudly as well he couldn't help but feel rather dizzy by now, and before he knew of it, he fainted.

**

When the Prince woke up the next morning he was in his room, with his sister, Hellboy and Abe in his room. He bore clothes again; Red and Abe had taken care of that so he wouldn't suddenly question them out why he didn't.

As he tried to sit up he felt a huge pain in his head "ow, what the heck have I been doing?" he said as he rubbed his aching head.

"That's called a hangover man" Red said, patting him hardly on the shoulder "you've been drinking too much" he chuckled.

Nuada grumbled and looked at his clothes "I didn't wear these yesterday" he said now suspicious.

Red and Abe looked at each other trying to figure out what to say.

"You were very tired last night brother, so I helped you get in something more comfortable" Nuala quickly answered, helping them out very much, she sent them a short smile, and they mimicked a 'thank you'.

Nuada looked surprised at his sister "oh" he just said, as if it was something very unnatural for siblings to see each other's nude bodies.

"So what exactly happened last night, 'cause I can't remember a thing" Nuada said still rubbing his head.

Once more Red and Abe looked at each other.

"Do you think we should tell him, Red?" Abe asked in a low voice.

Red smiled slyly at his fish-friend "nah, it's much funnier if he doesn't know".

- - - - -

**And since that day Nuada hadn't drunken with Red and Abe, or looked anyone from the BPRD (or his sister) in the eyes again.. No just kidding xD But I told you so didn't I? Humiliation! If Nuada was reading this ..I'd be dead xD Well I hope you enjoyed this anyways owo**

**Also I apologize if the beer-ingredients Abe is explaining isn't true, I didn't bother to look very much for it so I simply looked it up on Wikipedia n_n;**


End file.
